My thesis work has a lot to do with the study of stochastic processes, which is essentially the study of something that is random. It is often very difficult to describe natural phenomenon in exact terms, so they are modeled as random processes. The more information you can determine about a random process, the more you can predict its behavior, and therefore counteract its effects.
For example, your cell phone signal bounces off all kinds of objects (trees, people, buildings, etc.), and as a result, the tower hears a bunch of different echoes, which can often cause confusion as to what the real signal is. If the tower knew where every echo was coming from, that would be no problem; but in the real world, you don’t have perfect knowledge of where every person or building is at any given time. So at some point, a bunch of nerdy engineers went around with measuring equipment, and tried to come up with a general understanding of how a phone signal will act in different environments. With all this data, you can come up with a way to describe these random echoes mathematically. The problem is that no matter how accurate the model is, ultimately you’re dealing with a random process, which is, well, random. You can perfect the math until you’re blue in the face, but often times nature throws you a curve ball that wrecks it all.
So where on earth am I going with all this?
Well essentially, life is a random process, and despite all your best plans, things just go haywire. In my case, the statistical anomaly in my model presented itself in the form of a backhoe and a jackhammer.
See, last week I smelled gas in my laundry room, which as you know is not a good thing. I called the utility company, hoping for a minor leak in a valve. It turns out that in the 50s they often ran gas pipes underneath the concrete foundation, and unfortunately for me, these lines were leaking. As you can imagine, it’s not very easy to service lines buried under concrete, nor is it safe to have a gas leak underground like that. The solution for this little problem is to have new gas lines run onto the roof and then drilled down into the house.
The big bummer is that once a leak is detected, the utility company turns off your gas and absconds with the meter. The bigger bummer is that it takes a bit of time to coordinate a plumber to do the work and get the city’s approval. The biggest bummer is when you realize that without gas you cannot take a hot shower, or cook food.
It also appears that my next home improvement project is learning how to patch drywall. Thankfully, this is the only place that needs patching, as the heater and water heater are conveniently located right next to closets. My wallet on the other hand, might not be patchable.
So why the backhoe and the jackhammer? Well, entropy decided to toss one last sucker punch, in that the gas meter happened to be too close to a window to satisfy current safety regulations. This means that gas lines to the house had to be moved a few feet, which involves cutting a giant hole in the street. My yard made it by with only one minor hole, but the poor street might never look the same.
Now after a week of brisk showers and microwave cooking, I’m glad to be back on the natural gas bandwagon. Even if it means the home ownership honeymoon is coming to an end. (Well, maybe not, I still am pretty giddy about the house).
And I did beat entropy in one small way. The tile underneath my oven has never been cleaner. Take that nature!
